Archive for October, 2007

19
Oct
07

Surveillance camera magic fails to prevent ass-kicking

“Oh, oh, if we just install enough cameras, crime will magically go away.” That’s the established mythology we’ve used to justify an endless series of surveillance measures. The theory, we are told, is that if people think they’re being observed, they won’t do anything wrong.

Que hablo bullshit?

Funny how this turns out: those precious little CCTV cameras don’t actually prevent crimes, but they sure make for compelling footage on the morning news the next day. Must be coincidence.

Newsflash, my fellow hairless bipeds: the only person who cares about your safety is you. Not the cops, not the politicians, not the coffee-drinking drones hired to watch CCTV monitors: you and you alone. (Maybe your parents, if you’re lucky and if they live in the same country as you do.) Those pricy CCTV cameras are useful only for — at best — fuelling MI-5 plotlines and generating compelling footage of people like you getting fucked up for the evening news.

So it goes.

17
Oct
07

The risks of ubiquitous surveillance

The usual risk brought on by ubiquitous public surveillance is loss of individual privacy.  Anonymity is comforting; living under constant scrutiny is tiresome and dispiriting.  Ian Bell puts it well:

I DIDN’T break the law last week. Like the greatest number of you, I didn’t break the law the week before, or the week before that. Once upon a time I played football flagrantly in places where football was strictly forbidden. Years ago I withheld the poll tax, very politely I thought. But as criminal masterminds go, I’m one of life’s innocent bystanders.

So why is someone always trying to take my picture? Why does the government insist I pay for a plastic card just to grant complete strangers instant access to private information? Why does an English high court judge, a Lord Justice Sedley, believe it would be “fairer” if my genetic material, along with the DNA of everyone else who resides in or visits Britain, was held on a giant database?

[...]

There is no widespread sense of loss or infringement. Councils all over Britain have been installing CCTV systems as fast as they can procure the cash. Quiet villages are now “protected” and real crime, as the police admit, is “displaced”. Standard answer: erect still more cameras. Meanwhile, one brainless mantra fits all. “If you’ve done nothing wrong, you have nothing to fear.”

If I have done nothing wrong, which is to say illegal, what I happen to do is no-one’s business. If my body language is being “assessed” by some unseen operator for clues as to what might be going through my mind, however, I am, whatever anyone pretends, being investigated as a potential criminal. To be law-abiding is no longer an excuse.

Of course, that’s not all there is to it.  Bruce Schneier tells of a report detailing three other risks inherent in a ubiquitous surveillance scheme — in this case, large-scale telephone eavesdropping by the U.S. government:

The report identifies these risks:

  1. The danger that the system can be exploited by unauthorized users
  2. The danger of criminal misuse by a trusted insider
  3. The danger of misuse by the U.S. government

That first security risk is new to me, though given the cleverness of modern malware and the sheer mass of internet-connected computers used by (say) government, it’s distressingly credible.  My usual admonishment against sweeping government powers is that they never go away — even if this government can be trusted to refrain from abusing them, there’s no guarantee that the next government can be so trusted.  That’s not good enough with ubiquitous electronic surveillance: you need to trust everyone with access to the system, whether they’re authorized to use it or not.

And while we’re on the subject: why do we trust politicians to ferret out security threats, anyway?

(Hat tip: Bruce Schneier, of course)

Aldermen Frank Poolas, Jack Delaney and Michael Picciallo have found 100 unlicensed machines filled with gumballs, jawbreakers and other candies. The three feel they’re ripe for terrorists to lace with poisoned products.

[...]

Delaney says their goal is to create a registration process to find out where the candy is coming from.

Aha!  It’s not gumball machines that are the problem, it’s unlicensed candy dispensers.  Once the city regulates gumball machines, the problem will magically disappear by the power of government intervention.  Surprise, surprise.

Better luck next election, folks.

15
Oct
07

How to enjoy a beer

You’d think this would be pretty easy, right?

  1. Drink tasty beer
  2. See 1., above

This is a workable model, but it’s far from optimal.  There are far more considerations:

Al covers storage, temperature, pouring, and food pairings (among other things).  These are all important steps, and even if you aren’t willing to select a beer that pairs perfectly with your dinner, let it sit to achieve an optimal temperature, and pour it properly into an appropriate glass — you’ll probably enjoy most of your beer more if you at least consider these things.

For a counterpoint, Lucky reviews Miller High Life:

Here’s the bit where these two seemingly opposed articles come together:

High Life is what I would call a good pizza beer. It won’t replace my beloved Grain Belt Premium, but since I live in a state where the glorious butter-beer is not sold, High Life will do the trick. It’s light, crisp, and thoroughly satisfying. The head is rather thin but, come on, it’s a pilsner.

Context.

If you’re going to focus upon the beer — if you’re dedicating the last hour of your evening to the ebon pint of stout, for instance — then it’s surely worth taking the extra time to wash out a suitable glass, warm your beer, and pour it properly.  If you expect to be distracted from your beer (by pizza, for example), your time would be better spent on the main attraction: the beer’s a side dish.  If you’ve hit the point in your evening where more beer is too much, but much more beer is just right: the attraction is that you’re drinking, not what you’re drinking, so just grab the first thing you see.

12
Oct
07

I’m not sorry

Twice today I’ve come across sentences of the form:

“I’m sorry, but <unpopular position forcefully expressed>.”

Don’t be sorry!

Sure, most of us don’t want to be the asshole.  When we have no rhetorical choice but to express ourselves bluntly, we try to soften the blow with a throwaway line.   “I’m sorry, but” doesn’t sound sorry — it sounds passive-aggressive at best and cowardly at worst.

Here, I’ll fix it for you:

“Fuck you!  <Unpopular position forcefully expressed.>”

That reflexive little “I’m sorry” tick won’t abate any criticism of your unpopular opinions — and while we still have freedom of speech, we might as well make the most of it.

(I’m sure I’ve failed thus in the past, and I imagine I’ll do it again.  Dear and gentle readers, please correct me should I so fail.)

12
Oct
07

GWU fails the satire test

Not that any other campus of which I’m aware would do any better:

Damn laser-eyed creeps….

12
Oct
07

Democracy, apathy, and loud minorities

By way of introduction, here’s a personal anecdote.  The students’ union at my university had, until Wednesday, set a quorum of 500 students for its annual (and any special) general meetings.  There are well over 20,000 students here — getting one in fifty to show up doesn’t really seem like an onerous task.  Still, in the past ten years, these guys achieved quorum exactly twice:

  • Once when a particularly sleazy executive tried to screw over the grad students in the name of the Canadian Federation of Students (the CFS health plan was more expensive and less effective than the one we’d selected in a referendum earlier that year).  The grad student body pulled together to impeach the executive, ringing up numbers like 700 for, 6 against, 20 abstaining on each motion to impeach.
  • Once again — this Wednesday — when the grad students voted en masse to withdraw from the students’ union.

Why is this interesting?  Grad students make up maybe one-sixth of our student body.  Nonetheless, we accounted for an overwhelming majority of the people at each of those general meetings — probably in excess of 90% of the attendees.  We were a loud, committed, well-organized minority, and since no-one else bothered to show up, we got our way.

This follows directly from the first principles of participatory democracy.  If the “silent majority” doesn’t bother to show up, elections and referenda go to the strongest, loudest, best-organized (pardon the expression:) special-interest group.

Those of you from Alberta will no doubt cringe at that expression, but I can’t think of a better word to describe a group of people expressly united and organized around a single goal.

The dominance of small (relative to the total eligible population) and well-organized groups in low-participation polls shows up every time the Republicans debate and some network knob (most recently CNBC) pulls an online poll with, say, 75% votes in favour of Ron Paul.

Briefly: “Yeah, Ron Paul got a lot of votes, but you’re just a bunch of loud, well-organized people on the internet.”  As James Ostrowski puts it on LR.c:

To put up a poll where the respondents are self-selected and then attack it because it fails to mirror the results of polls where the respondents are not self-selected is just dumb.

The respondents to CNBC’s poll, like the attendees at the two union meetings I described above, were self-selected.  In both cases, the vast majority of eligible participants found other things to do.

Sort of like voters in Ontario’s recent provincial elections:

The percentage of eligible voters casting ballots in Wednesday’s Ontario election hit an all-time low despite changes introduced in an effort to boost turnout.

Only 52.6 per cent of eligible voters cast a ballot, or 4.4 million of 8.4 million possible voters, according to numbers released by Elections Ontario at 6:30 a.m. ET Thursday, when 99.8 per cent of polls had been counted.

The turnout was worse than a previous record low of 54.7 per cent set in 1923. It also fell below the 2003 voter turnout of 56.9 per cent.

Okay, okay, 47.4% isn’t even a majority (let alone a vast one), but it made a nice segue.  When half the eligible population shows up to vote, you’re far less likely to steamroller an election with a committed minority group, particularly if your cause scares the grass-eaters (who, as one might imagine, tend to be dangerous in herds).   Nonetheless, as fewer and fewer people vote, any “mandate” the winning party claims gets more and more dubious.  CBC.ca reports that the Ontario Liberal party simultaneously won a “massive majority” and 42.19% of the popular vote — which is really 22.19% of eligible voters.

Hey — if their 22.19% can be a “massive majority”, then my 47.4% can damn well be a “vast majority”.  We are well and truly through the looking glass now — but that’s what happens when you mix first-past-the-post democracy with modern popular journalism.

Now, here’s the blasphemous question: so what?

Many politicians consider low voter turnout to be a bad thing.  The Ontario Liberals sure do — they passed legislation to increase voter turnout after the “low” (56.9%) turnout in 2003.  From the above article on low voter turnout:

Legislation introduced by the previous Liberal government since the 2003 election to boost declining turnout in recent elections did not seem to have the desired effect.

(Are we at all surprised that reality once again trumped legislation?  Not if we’ve been paying attention.  Better luck next election, folks.)

Is low voter turnout a bad thing?  In the antiseptic idealized abstract, sure — we’d surely like for each and every citizen with the franchise to study the issues, carefully weigh each candidate, and vote according to s/h/its best judgement.  But here in the real world, that’s dreadfully unlikely.  If my experience at crosswalks is any indication, most Canadians don’t have the judgement to cross the street unless a white glowing stick figure on the other side of the intersection tells them it’s safe to do so.  (Pedwalks in my part of town are not automatic: you might have right-of-way and a “don’t walk” signal.)

If someone can’t tell when they have right-of-way to cross the fucking street, I don’t want them voting.  “Look both ways” is one of the first things we teach children when they learn to walk.  Adults who can’t handle that much responsibility should not be out in public unsupervised, let alone encouraged to elect national governments.

I can only see two extreme alternatives, both unpleasant: we can either encourage (at gunpoint, if necessary — all government power is ultimately backed by bullets and bayonets) legions of apathetic and ignorant people to vote, or we can put more and more power into the hands of small, focused, and well-organized minority groups.  If I had to choose, I’d probably opt for the latter: if you get a broad enough section of minority groups involved, it starts to resemble Adam Smith’s idealized free market.  The only problem is that this market only works every four or five years, and has the power to legislate away the profit motive (see bullets and bayonets, above).

Of course, the less power you give the government, the less of a problem this dilemma poses.  (But you probably knew that — or at least saw it coming.)

11
Oct
07

Still more dubious security measures

If you’re reading this in Britain, you can become a terrorist in two easy clicks1:

  1. Follow this link to Wikipedia’s article on The Anarchist Cookbook
  2. Follow one of the links at the bottom of that article to grab yourself an electronic copy of the famous text

It is apparently a violation of the “Terrorist Act 2000″ to possess a copy of TAC.

A British teenager who is accused of possessing material for terrorist purposes has appeared in court.

[...]

It is alleged he had a copy of the “Anarchists’ Cookbook”, containing instructions on how to make home-made explosives.

(Hat tip: Donklephant.)

Yep, those books sure are scary. (So, apparently, are multi-sentence paragraphs: the article has none.) “Knowledge is power; power corrupts. Study hard: be evil.” Specifically, the Terrorist Act 2000 makes it an offence to “collect or possess information useful in the preparation of an act of terrorism” (though the Act itself probably does so in the passive voice).

Now, it must surely be useful to be well-fed when preparing an act of terrorism. Does the Act make possession of cook-books (of the culinary, rather than explosive, kind) an offence? Similarly: shall we ban chemistry textbooks? I’d think that a basic understanding of chemistry would be very useful to someone who wanted to prepare recipes from TAC and live to tell the tale. “Useful” is an awfully broad term. There’s plenty of potential for abuse there.

And on the flip side of the issue: when so much information is readily available on this here internet, charging people for owning books doesn’t do you much good. So: we have a security measure of dubious real utility and enormous potential for abuse. Quelle fucking surprise.

Back on this side of the pond, we’re (as usual) doing essentially the same thing: trading real liberty for security theatre:

Here’s what happened: First, the Canadian and American governments collaborate on a Canadian no-fly list, about which I’ve written before. Now, DHS has decided that the Canadian list isn’t sufficient, and wants passenger information for Canadian flights that pass over the United States three days in advance.

[Air Transport Association of Canada policy vice-president Fred] Gaspar told the CBC the proposal seems out of place, since Canada already has its own no-fly list in place — a list that was developed, in fact, after close consultation with the U.S. government.

“The Canadian and U.S. governments have been co-operating quite extensively on the development of secure civil aviation,” Gaspar said Thursday. “Why would you encourage the Canadian government to develop its own no-fly list if you’re now saying, ‘Thank you very much, it’s no value for us’?”

Why indeed? Simply this: because it gives government more power. Power is to government what profit is to industry. The Canadian and American governments are interested in “secure civil aviation” in the same way that Toyota is interested in building cars: as a means to an end.

Essential liberty, temporary security; you know the rest.

1 Or you can fucking move to a free country.

09
Oct
07

Governments respond to zombie threat

Zombies: imaginary horror or terrifying threat?  In these “can’t be too careful” times, surely it’s better to prepare for the possibility of shambling undead hordes than it is to risk having one’s brain eaten.  (That’s what zombies do: they eat brains.)

Fortunately, government is swinging into action to mitigate the difficult-to-verify but scarier-than-al-Qaeda zombie threat.  Operating under the assumption that zombies aren’t evil, just hungry and misunderstood, South Carolina’s Department of Social Services makes it possible for the recently reanimated to obtain food stamps:

“Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances.” – Letter from the Department of Social Services, Greenville, South Carolina

If you happen to see a rotting corpse in line at the local supermarket clutching a case of no-name Mac and Cheese, don’t stare: it’s rude and insensitive.  Well-fed zombies may overcome the limitations of their condition and resume their roles as productive members of society, but if they feel marginalized they’re likely to rip open your skull and feast upon your, well, braaiiiiiinsssss.

Speaking of zombies, food, and productive societal roles, the Federal Government has been in on the act for decades now.  If zombies are aggressive primarily when they’re hungry, what better place for a zombie than on a farm, surrounded by food?

Yep.  The United States Department of Agriculture has been subsidizing dead farmers, presumably to allow them to compete with gigantic agricorps should they ever rise from the grave.

A report by the Government Accountability Office says USDA paid $1.1 billion in subsidies to 172,801 dead people between 1999 through 2005. Forty percent of that money went to people who had been for at least three years, the report found.

Thank goodness for our heroic benefactors in D.C., protecting us from the hideous consequences of the peckish undead.




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