Okay, hang on just a fucking minute.

I notice that Pilsner Urquell’s website doesn’t particularly solicit traffic from what some of us laughingly call “minors”.

Heh heh heh.

Yeah, like the — what, dozen or so? — “underage” teenagers who want to browse around their purported website (I can’t actually verify that they have a website: apparently, I have an insufficiently 31337 Flash plugin) aren’t clever enough to falsify their birthdates. And yeah, I’m really quite confident that drinking age restrictions have reduced the rate of underage drinking. (If you believe that, please by God send me money. You’re gullible and I’m a starving student.)

Come the fuck on. Everyone who wants to drink will drink. If so-called “underage” drinkers want some boozeahol, they’ll get it. Within five or six years, they’ll (probably) grow out of it, and their livers will probably still be intact.

I’m disgusted by the fact that we (I’m speaking as an American now) let eighteen-year-old men and women fight, kill, and die for our country, but refuse them a fucking beer. I dunno, you tell me: what takes more maturity? Centering a post inside a notch, pressing a trigger, and killing another human being, or taking a sip of dilute ethanol?

I fucking wonder.

I have nothing but respect for those who serve, and nothing but contempt for those who insist on treating them as irresponsible children. “Support our troops”, indeed.